Category Archives: Department Briefings

Electronic Arts To Launch More Games Into Space

Last week, video game publisher Electronic Arts launched copies of their science fiction game Mass Effect 3 into space as part of a promotion for the final installment in that massively popular science fiction trilogy.  Today they announced that they will continue … Continue reading

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Situation Report: Electronic Arts Is Working With The Iranians

The following DoEE Department Briefing has been declassified as per the Freedom Of Information Act: “Agents, we’ve encountered a worse-case scenario and are initiating the ‘Titan Protocols’.  While we anticipated that Electronic Arts might ally itself with another major game … Continue reading

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Black Friday Casualties Within Acceptable Limits

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The following Department Briefing has been declassified as per the Freedom of Information Act: “Agents, I’d like to thank you all for the overtime you’ve put in during the last 72 hours.  Without your efforts, I’m certain that the collateral … Continue reading

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Modern Warfare 3 Fails to Earn One Billion Dollars

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It is with regret that the Department of Electronic Entertainment makes this announcement regarding the financial health of the gaming industry: In their most recent financial statement, Activision has confirmed that Call of Duty Modern Warfare 3 failed to earn even … Continue reading

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Department Briefing: Call of Duty Franchise May Not End in 2012

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The following transcript has been made public as per the Freedom of Information Act: “Good evening Agents I apologize for bringing you in at this hour, but there has been a development.  Even though this year’s installment of the Call … Continue reading

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